PEIGHUP, CA - Helpful Finance, a Domestic Bank corporation, introduced last month its controversial new program, "Indentured Servant". The program is intended to address the needs of its customers that find themselves beyond all financial recovery due to the "edge loans" the company makes.

"Edge lenders" are those that lend money to those consumers sitting on the edge of insolvency. The gamble is that these customers will languish in utter financial ruin, but will not quite fall into bankruptcy. "It's a balancing act," said Polly Langhorn, Chief Loan Officer for Helpful, "The 'sweet spot' is pushing them far enough over the edge that they can't be reached by other lenders for a lower-interest re-fi, but keep them safe enough that that can't benefit from going bankrupt. In a market where 'edge lending' is becoming so common, we needed a product that stood out and gave us an edge, if you will."

The product is "Indentured Servant" and as the name implies, a consumer signs over his life, his assets, and any future earnings to Helpful in exchange for all outstanding debts. One consumer -- Billy Young, a 32-year-old computer programmer -- raves about the program. "It's been great! I sleep at night now. Before, I tossed and turned, worried about foreclosure or just late payments. Now I go to bed when they tell me, get up when they tell me. My kids attend their school, we shop in their grocery. And we all live happy, fulfilled lives." Three other consumers we interviewed said the same thing. Word for word. When asked if these were scripted responses, we were referred to Helpful's lawyers, that explained that part of the contract for the "Indentured Servants" program is only using Helpful-approved statements in reference to the program. Legal remedies for violation include "donation" of organs. Compliance has been high, reports counsel.

"It's slavery, plain and simple," said Marjorie Plix, who runs a web site decrying modern lending practices. "These people are rendered mindless husks, serving the great Helpful overlords. Why isn't this illegal?"

One senator we interviewed that asked to remain anonymous said, "Helpful has introduced a program that is a legal and fair alternative to bankruptcy for some consumers. They are providing a service the American people want and need, and it is not our place to get in their way." Four other senators we interviewed said the same thing. Word for word.
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