The Bentinel Logo Home | FAQ | Links | Book (New!) | Archive
Bending the truth to fit the facts!
-- Clean, family-friendly news satire and parody --




Book (New!)


RSS feed for The Bentinel

Let us send you an email when a new story is published! Enter your email address above and press Alert Me!
privacy policy

Did you know?
ORK FROM HOME Program Investigated
(email to a friend)

COLUMBUS, OH - Consumers throughout Central Ohio have complained to the Better Business Bureau and federal agencies, charging fraud and deceit by Minneapolis-based ORK FROM HOME. The company charges $29 for a startup kit, claiming the income from the home-based business can exceed $100,000 a year. Consumers only realize after they pay for and receive the kit that it entails collecting parts from the bodies of beached, dead Orcas.

"The very idea is of course, repellant," said Attorney General for Ohio Marlin Byloadmin, "but the legal issue arises from the deceit." The ORK FROM HOME signs are designed to look as if they originally said, WORK FROM HOME, with the "W" broken off the upper-left corner of each sign. Byloadmin continued, "Honest, sincere, perhaps na´ve, but hard-working Ohioans are being bilked out of hundreds of thousands of dollars believing that they are getting a chance to earn a living while staying home with their families. Even if there was gold to be mined in the dead bodies of dolphins, what Ohio resident can do anything with them from his landlocked home? Toss one in the SUV, drive it home, and chop it up in his garage on the weekends?"

"That's one option, sure," said Peter Caffrey, owner of ORK FROM HOME, "or they could change their home. I mean, our signs don't say they can work from the home they have now. It does after all say that they would be processing whale bodies -- or Ork'ing, as we call it -- and they would reasonably want to live close to a source of the animals."

"It's a puzzle. Class-action is not likely since the damages are only $30 a pop. No one would go through the pain of the trial, and the legal expenses would eat up any punitive damages levied. It's quite a scam, I think he'll get away with it," said Attorney Kirk Aminear, "I wouldn't touch the case."

Whether the legal issue is settled soon or not, the proliferation of "ORK FROM HOME" signs is not likely to abate any time soon. Caffrey sells the signs to homeless people for $1 a piece. "What they do with them after I sell them is their business," he said. What they do is post them all over Columbus and other cities Caffrey targets, then come back for more. Said one homeless man, "We don't ever throw 'em down. One feller did that and he didn't never get no more signs from Ol' Pete."
(email to a friend)


Looking for the best web site in the whole world? Look no further than! Loonwatch Islamophobia Ilisha, a site exposing the lies about Islam and Muslims. Do you think you have a Russian Girlfriend? Think again! Are you looking for a family portrait or wedding photographer in Dallas, Texas? Images by Andi is here for you! Looking for gently-used, cheap, tax-free cigarettes? They're available here. In the market for Weber Grills? This site has 'em. Are you addicted to sugar? Then you could use Self-Help for Sugar Addiction. Like movies? Check out these Movie Trailers. Down on your luck? Perhaps you'll need some Prescription Drugs Online. If that doesn't help, maybe you'll just stay home and Download movies. With the money you save on popcorn, you can play at this online casino . If you're driven into Drug Abuse, this site has the answer. Like jokes? Visit The Joke Teller Web Site! Like games or programs? Go to Josef's site!

Copyright 2003-2004, The Bentinel (, All Rights Reserved