The Bentinel Logo Home | FAQ | Links | Book (New!) | Archive
Bending the truth to fit the facts!
-- Clean, family-friendly news satire and parody --




Book (New!)


RSS feed for The Bentinel

Let us send you an email when a new story is published! Enter your email address above and press Alert Me!
privacy policy

Did you know?
Bush Offers To Help Fund Nader Campaign
(email to a friend)

CRAWFORD, Texas - Speaking from his ranch in Crawford, Texas, President Bush Friday said he would be willing to help fund Ralph Nader's campaign. "It is one of the truest symbols of America, the independent American running for the presidency," He said, "Like Al Sharpton, I'm sure he doesn't run to win. But he'll bring attention to his issues, unite his supporters, and have fun doing it! In a heart beat I can rally thousands of Republicans to provide him with the dollars he needs to get launched." He went on to offer private planning sessions at the ranch and rides on Air Force One.

"It is very altruistic," said Kerry campaign representative, Mark Kornblau, "but I doubt charity is all that is motivating it." Analysts agree that if Nader runs, it will make electing a democratic president very difficult. "Typically, a Nader supporter is a politically active individual who believes in the power of his vote," said political analyst Dr. Harold Clarke, "If Nader runs, this person feels a responsibility to vote for him. If he doesn't, then that same person would almost surely vote democratic."

Nader has not publicly commented on the President's offer, though sources close to him say that he considers the offer to be an honest one. "He really believes Bush just wants to help," said a pizza delivery man with whom Nader has had many in-depth conversations, "I think he's a little flaky, frankly. Good tipper, though."

Nader is expected to make known his intentions Sunday on Meet The Press.
(email to a friend)


Looking for the best web site in the whole world? Look no further than! Loonwatch Islamophobia Ilisha, a site exposing the lies about Islam and Muslims. Do you think you have a Russian Girlfriend? Think again! Are you looking for a family portrait or wedding photographer in Dallas, Texas? Images by Andi is here for you! Looking for gently-used, cheap, tax-free cigarettes? They're available here. In the market for Weber Grills? This site has 'em. Are you addicted to sugar? Then you could use Self-Help for Sugar Addiction. Like movies? Check out these Movie Trailers. Down on your luck? Perhaps you'll need some Prescription Drugs Online. If that doesn't help, maybe you'll just stay home and Download movies. With the money you save on popcorn, you can play at this online casino . If you're driven into Drug Abuse, this site has the answer. Like jokes? Visit The Joke Teller Web Site! Like games or programs? Go to Josef's site!

Copyright 2003-2004, The Bentinel (, All Rights Reserved