PODUNK, Connecticut - Support centers across the United States and Europe are reporting alarming increases in the number of so-called "ID10T" sightings on the Internet. Even in generally more secure corporate intranets, the problem is a growing one. "Oh yeah, we see lots of I-D-10-T's," explained one support technician, "I had a woman the other day that wanted to know how to reboot her mouse. I told her it was a classic ID10T problem and she asked if that was covered by her service agreement!"

"Oh yeah, we see lots of I-D-10-T's." -- Support Technician

"You do get it, don't you?" asked another technician, when asked about the surge of the ID10T virus, "I mean, you've seen it written out, right? Write it slowly, in capital letters. Do you get it now?"

Computer virus expert Wayne Wexford volunteered to explain the basic function of ID10T: "See, when you're dealing with an ID10T, you have to say things like 'see' a lot. And you have to explain the meanings of things. It's much like a PEBKAC problem, in that respect." When asked to elaborate on 'PEBKAC', Wexford laughed, patted the reporter patronizingly on the head, then offered to sell him an 'Any key', guessing -- correctly -- that his keyboard lacked one.

World-leading anti-virus software makers Symantec and McAfee both refused to discuss their plans for the elimination of ID10T, though a McAfee representative did offer these words of encouragement, "If we ever manage to cure it, you'll be the first to know."
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