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Man Still Fat, Lazy, After Purchasing 'Rayma' Bracelet
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LOUISVILLE, Kentucky - After reading about the amazing scientific basis for the Rayma bracelet, Roger Munkie decided to give it a try. "I saw that they knewd about the hundreds of cells in ma body," he explained, "And how there's this here stuck-up energy that's balancin' 'em all outta whack. My bracelet's s'posed to put all that right. But it really ain't seemin' to do it." He toyed dejectedly with the cable-and-ball open-loop bracelet before admitting, "Now I'm not so sure that them folks is even scientists at all."

"I think I would have to suggest a Rayma."
-- Bryant Goimet, medical researcher
Rayma bracelets, manufactured according to 'metallurgy traditions' from Mallorca, Spain, are sold from web sites and street vendors the world over, espoused for their supposed health benefits. "Oh yes, I owe my life to my Raymas," effused one woman, selling the bracelets in her health food store, "I was always depressed. I had no energy, no spark. My family was getting frustrated with me because I couldn't bring myself to cook or clean or even play with them. Then a friend bought me a Rayma." She described a remarkable recovery over the course of three weeks. "I don't go anywhere without one on each wrist and ankle," she gushed, hiking up her skirt to reveal a bracelet on each ankle.

"I guess what I like best about these things is that they aren't likely to hurt the people that use them," said medical researcher Bryant Goimet, "Unlike shark cartilage or potent herbs or any other ingested fraud, this at least has few if any potential side-effects, all of which could be mitigated by simply removing the bracelet. If a patient asked me how they could throw their money away naturally and with the fewest side-effects, I think I would have to suggest a Rayma."

Rayma Bracelets refused our requests for an interview, but their web site proudly declares, "The Rayma Bracelet may have therapeutic effects on the whole body." Noting that the site also mentions that the bracelet should be "worn on the right wrist, with the spheres on the top," we asked Mr. Munkie if he had followed this advice. While he had not, the site also mentions that if the right/up configuration has no 'noticeable therapeutic effect', the "wearer can try placing the spheres on the bottom of the wrist or even placing the bracelet on the left wrist with the spheres on the bottom." "That's why I'm so persplexed," sighed Munkie, "I done jes what they said. But I'm still fat. And I think I might jes be lazier'n ever."
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