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Bush Nominates Oral Roberts as Chief Justice
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WASHINGTON D.C. - Moving quickly to fill the vacancy left by Chief Justice William H. Rehnquist's death, President Bush on Monday nominated Reverend Oral Roberts to the nation's top judicial post. "It is fitting that a great chief justice be followed in office by a person who holds dearly to the values on which our Constitution is based," Bush said from the White House, with the reverend by his side.

"All I can say is, 'Expect a Miracle'!"
-- Nominee Oral Roberts
"I am honored and humbled by the confidence that the president has shown in me," Roberts said, "And I can tell you that if I am confirmed, I would bring much needed change to a court that has lost its moral compass. All I can say is, 'Expect a Miracle'!" Roberts accepted the offer in a meeting with Bush on Monday morning, a senior administration official said.

Top Republican officials said Roberts' nomination hearings, originally set to begin Tuesday, would be delayed. It remains unclear when they will take place. Senator Ted Kennedy, of Massachusetts, said the hearings must not be rushed, particularly in light of the "unusual nature and background of the candidate." Particularly troubling is Roberts' lack of legal training, or in fact college degree of any kind. His primary education was in various Bible schools in Oklahoma, though there is no record that he graduated from any of them.

Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, of Tennessee, issued a statement Monday saying the president "has made an excellent choice; Reverend Roberts is one of the most well qualified candidates to come before the Senate. Many people talk about 'old time religion', but brother, this man really lives it."

"This nomination certainly raises the stakes in making sure that the American people and the Senate know Reverend Roberts' views fully before he assumes perhaps the second most powerful position in the United States," said Sen. Charles Schumer, of New York, in a written statement. "He has a clear obligation to make his views known fully and completely at the hearings, and we look forward to them."

"Everything they need to know about me they can read in a book that they probably have in their homes right now. Maybe you've heard of it. I call it the Good Book, but it's often called simply, 'The Bible'," said Roberts, "And if they have any more questions, they can consult one of the 100-plus books I've written explaining my faith. The President and I have spoken at length on the subject; I'm sure he can set them straight as well."

Bush called on the Senate to confirm Roberts within a month.
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